these winds, white and raging, rip across the plains and tumble over the mountains excitedly, rolling great and terrifying storms in their currents. a bright light of morning will steadily give way to the encroaching darkness of afternoon whose breezes become sharp and wet, ferocious and sensual with the life promised within those gathering clouds. it seems these are the moments that artists dream of, where so many layers of light dance through so many layers of cloud, golden dawn and steely night mingling in a bachanalian weather dance in shamelessly entrancing hues. that blue! where did it come from? that golden pink! the color of the lips of the goddess! i stretch into the sky to suckle, lifted from gravity by sheer devotional madness. my senses are verily enraptured from my body and i am rendered socially unacceptable as i run naked in the storm through the grassy field behind my house or along the mountain path.
such taboos i destroy in my rapture! they are only taboo because my freedom to love the earth so voraciously is unabashed by the idea that i should be clothed and sit in the warm shelter of a picture window, watching the glory of creation unfold like a tv show for sensual retards. fuck that. i'm exstatic. if not, i am missing the point. you can't deny the sexual healing of a torrential storm. if you've never been there, go spread yourself open to the thunder - it changes everything.
the deities are rumbling over head, every sharp word a brilliant flash of lightning as they tensely sculpt the fate of this earthly moment, every gravitational exchange a glorious bass of thunder permeating my little being with all of the energy of the universe. resting into the orgasmically satiated body of the wet mother beneath me, i feel their explosive conversation in my hips, my lungs, my open mouth. drinking deep the brilliant waters of becoming, i know i am one of a million creatures in this raging river, wholly unique and utterly invisible. only i can be the cell that i am, and only the whole body can validate my existence.
while there is much to do to "save the world" this act of sensual communion with creation is of the utmost importance in a very simple way.
journey with me} creation is satisfied in communion with itself. so why delineate? because there is yet more rapture to experience in the phenomenon of relationship. a beautiful lilac bush spread two bundles of bloom from a single stem just as the legs of a luscious lover would spread for the tongue of the beloved. they were wet and fragrant, tender and tremendous purple in the grey wind of the rainstorm. so i buried my face between the blooms and suckled the water from within their beautiful contours. the mother laughed and swept wind across our kiss to move them around my face, soaking me in scent and water. the lilac kissed me back, and remembered me when next i passed her. her blooms, so short lived and so ravaged by these storms as they flow through, were short lived, and now they are gone, brown and shriveled and falling from the branched of the bush. a fleeting moment that creation arranged just for us to immerse in the radical eros of each other, of the whole moment. in that moment, we were the fruition of a well planned gifting of love to love. the brilliance of creation satisfied in experiencing itself.
this earth is as sensual a lover as one could ever hope to encounter, wild in her diversity of pleasures. this earth is a brilliantly crafted gift to the sensing body, a sensual masterpiece designed to entice, saturate and satiate every single aspect of every element of the physical incarnation. we have flowers of astonishing variety whose scents, textures, colors and tastes are designed to so enrapture and enrich us, it is certain that they are the clever contrivance of a beloved only interested in pleasing the beloved. we have foods whose tastes nourish, please and disgust us, and each of which create a different experience in the body by stimulating and interacting with different chemicals and processes within us. the whole planet (and no, i'm not talking about monkey settlements) is a phenomenal act of architectural brilliance, inviting exploration and discovery to enliven and expand the scope of being, for each hike, trek, walkabout and wander bring untold revelations to the psyche, provided one gets out of the head long enough to take it in.
all of creation is a gift for us to dive into naked and wild, and it is one of the most primal and perfect ways that we can honor the gift to do so. we must worship the earth to understand what we are fighting for if we choose to fight.
i'll never forget when i went to uluru, also know as ayers rock, in australia. it's in the middle of the outback, hell and gone from everywhere except for alice springs, which exists solely as a tourist transfer station for it. the rock is a single massive red monolith in the desert and was the place of female initiation rites for the aboriginal tribes that lived in the area before the regular story of white fuckery played out. i had waited years for the opportunity, spent something like a week getting there, and it was a pilgrimage for me for which i was wholly prepared with offerings and a dance and specific prayers. i walked around the base of the rock looking for my spot, walking slowly so i could drink in the miraculous resonance of her long and full journey as a sacred site on the planet. when i found my spot, i returned to nudity, planted a crystal in a grid in the sand, and danced a prayer with her for things that are not to be written. she flowed through the sand into my body, filled my with her wisdom and her light, graced and nourished me with her power and all of the rites of passage that she had nourished in her being. i fell, famished and elated, to the ground, after many hours of this worship. i had honored her, the women of the story, and myself by arriving fully into her embrace with reverent humility.
one thing that i noticed, as i was walking to and from my ritual, was that the people who had come from so far to this extremely holy place were not even looking at her. most of the people were doggedly walking the two mile track around the rock with their heads down, talking about mundane shit from wherever they had come from like they weren't even there. then, when they would look up, it would be with a camera between them and the rock as some kind of shield between them and the transformation inherent in a real communion with her. that fascinated (and, at the time, profoundly angered) me. one had to travel so far to be there. one had to want to be there, really want it, to go the distance to be there. so why go and not have the experience? why go to the naked clitoris of initiation and not drink it in?
theory} people are drawn to ancient sacred sites, to mountaintops and waterfalls and canyons and caves, because what is ancient and wise in them knows that the healing and nourishment available in these places is absolutely crucial to the wellness and the fulfillment of the being that they are underneath all of the life that has transpired over their truth. but because we are starved for ritual, ceremony and exstasy in this way of being that is working to strangle the life out of life, we don't know how to allow it in to affect us. it is dangerous, because subconsciously we know that to be affected by the sacred nature of the earth means a disconnection from the lie of living that we all live in, even when we are awakening. to be a rapturous lover of the natural world means that we will no longer be able to participate unquestioningly in the animal holocaust, the environmental holocaust, the spiritual holocaust of our times. we will have to be active participants in the liberation of life which is no easy or tiny task. it doesn't reside in changing light bulbs or buying a hybrid or any of the other ways that are consumer band-aids for the conscious complacent. it means conflict with "the way things are" and possible excommunication from the masses for being "a freak".
i'm a freak. praise everything. and i'm not fully awake yet.
before the death of a few years ago, i was a fighting-with-everyone-and-everything self-righteous vegan anarchist capoeirista who thought and expressed that everyone had their heads in their fucking asses and fuck you for being asleep, you lazy ignorant bastard. oh, yeah. it was intense. i would go off on any and everyone about any and everything from the new world order and how drinking coke was paying for the slaughter of south american villagers (which is true) to how eating meat was destroying the environment (also true) to how spiritual starvation was being perpetuated by public schools, churches and television (all true). the issue being that i was so angry and judgmental that my approach inspired defensive positions more than awakening, because my approach was an attack. i was just angry. in that anger, i couldn't share the volumes of very useful information that i had gathered with anyone, because i was so spiritually diseased by what i knew and completely lacking guidance about how to be other than angry.
i had to go live in concert with life and creation before i could do anything to encourage other people to do the same. and i had to realize how hard it is to wake up before i could realize that everyone, even if they seem to be a lazy bastard to me, is doing their best with their own tools to wake up in a situation that almost completely prohibits integral living. i had to have my own awakening through love before i could understand that you can't beat people awake, and that everyone only comes to it in their own time and in their own way. before i had the humiliating realization that just because i knew about didn't make me conscious. ooooh, that smarts. i'm so much better than everyone else!
i find now that i don't come forth with as much as i know about the dominant paradigm in the third dimension for a number of reasons. one is that i know i'm not quite equanimous enough to represent my position without fighting with someone if they won't take it up when i give them my information. i just know that, and i don't want to fight with anyone anymore. another is that i also recognize the limitations of my perspectives, because they are so fluid and impressionable within myself. another is that i recognize that i don't know what people have been through to be in the value systems that they are, and i should learn about that first so that i can approach something respectfully if i decide that i need to approach it at all.
but the most wonderful thing to learn is that my radiant being is what opens doors for transformational experience. if i live well, feel good and am radiant in love, people want to know what i'm doing to be there, and will come to me to learn. it is more of a direct service to be the way that i am and to be an invitation to any and everyone to find that same radiance within themselves. and in this way, i respect creation and everyones experience by being open to questions instead of aggressive with answers. if someone wants to wake up and they like the way that they feel i am awake, then they can come to me and i will offer everything of my experience for them to play with.
guatam buddha said to his disciples, "i can not bring you to enlightenment. i can tell you what i did that brought me to enlightenment. it may or may not work for you. you must try it, challenge it, modify it, to reach your own enlightenment. there is no one way". so while i really want to smack people around for the way we're all living on the earth, i remain humble because i am not yet perfected, and i do believe that everyone is doing their best. i have a lot to offer. but it is only what i have to offer and there is yet so much in the world to taste and love.
but i unreservedly offer this - go make love with the storm. lay into the body of the mother in naked rapture, spread open and shameless, to be ravaged and healed by creation. it begins an alchemical process in the event horizon between the universe and the body that utterly and beautifully transforms the incarnate consciousness. it brings us into resonance with this natural world so that we are one with creation instead of polarized against it, or alienated from it. that unity is our birthright. it is one of the reasons that we are here. don't bereave yourself of that.
en lakesh, may it serve.
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